After getting the news that Rachel got 2 weeks ago she has been busy making sure all the last minute things are taken care of and that nothing is left undone.
Hospice has been coming out to the house to help Rachel with her pain management and any other medical need that she might have. This has been nice because now we don't have to worry about taking Rachel to the ER anymore when ever her pain is too great. We just call hospice and they send a nurse out to take care of Rachel.
Rachel has been teaching me the books for the shop, her finances and Mom and Dad's finances. Talk about overwhelming amount of information but I am enjoying the distraction.
Many friends and family have been coming to visit Rachel which has been wonderful and uplifting. It helps distract Rachel from the pain and the unknown future.
This is from a friend who came over yesterday...I really appreciate what she has to say:
Fighter/noun/meanings
1. A person or animal that fights, esp. as a soldier or a boxer.
2. A person who does not easily admit defeat in spite of difficulties or opposition.
1 Timothy 6:12
Fight the good fight for the faith. Keep holding on to eternal life, to which you were called and about which you gave a good testimony in front of many witnesses.
So, after thinking today – while visiting Rachel – about this whole “fighting” thing…I felt like I wanted to write something on it. Personally, I feel like using the term “fight” is almost an unfair one! Now, that said, I have used it MANY times – I’m sure I will do it again as well… it’s kind of what you SAY to people who are sick, right? One of those pre-programmed words that we all learn, especially when it pertains to cancer. But it hit me WHY I don’t like it! Because (and I could be crazy) I almost feel like it puts ridiculous amounts of pressure on who you say it to, or about. When dealing with this awful thing *I HATE YOU, CANCER*, to say someone is a fighter almost makes it seem like if they “lose” this fight, it was their own fault…as though you can train for a fight with cancer? You make sickeningly hard decisions, never truly knowing what the outcome will be…hoping and praying for the best. You don’t get the satisfaction of punching someone or something that would come from an actual fight…And what you do get is, in many cases, strangers deciding you aren’t “fighting” hard enough, or that you have given up, when God forbid they were in your shoes they would be at a loss themselves. So it hit me that i think fighting is relative to the person and situation. Did you get up? Get dressed? Say, “good morning” to your family? Hug your kids and family members? Try to eat breakfast even though it doesn’t taste like anything anymore? Be AMAZINGLY kind and thoughtful to everyone that crosses your path? Ask someone else how THEY are doing? Smile at your nieces and nephews being silly? I think anyone who knows Rachel, knows without a doubt all these things happen, and then some. I leave visiting my childhood friend who I love so much, feeling encouraged by her faith, but hating to see her in pain. I pray for healing! I do not want her to leave us, I want to be selfish and make her stay somehow….but I also think she should know that it’s ok….that when God calls her home where there is no more pain, that it’s more than ok to run for it as fast as she can. And though she tells me she doesn’t feel like a fighter, she really is…and I love her dearly for it. This isn’t what she chose this happened to her, but she IS choosing every day, maybe hundreds of times a day, how to deal with it. And to keep believing and trusting God, to smile at someone, to drink some hot tea, or to eat a piece of pizza with her husband and sister IS fighting.
1. A person or animal that fights, esp. as a soldier or a boxer.
2. A person who does not easily admit defeat in spite of difficulties or opposition.
1 Timothy 6:12
Fight the good fight for the faith. Keep holding on to eternal life, to which you were called and about which you gave a good testimony in front of many witnesses.
So, after thinking today – while visiting Rachel – about this whole “fighting” thing…I felt like I wanted to write something on it. Personally, I feel like using the term “fight” is almost an unfair one! Now, that said, I have used it MANY times – I’m sure I will do it again as well… it’s kind of what you SAY to people who are sick, right? One of those pre-programmed words that we all learn, especially when it pertains to cancer. But it hit me WHY I don’t like it! Because (and I could be crazy) I almost feel like it puts ridiculous amounts of pressure on who you say it to, or about. When dealing with this awful thing *I HATE YOU, CANCER*, to say someone is a fighter almost makes it seem like if they “lose” this fight, it was their own fault…as though you can train for a fight with cancer? You make sickeningly hard decisions, never truly knowing what the outcome will be…hoping and praying for the best. You don’t get the satisfaction of punching someone or something that would come from an actual fight…And what you do get is, in many cases, strangers deciding you aren’t “fighting” hard enough, or that you have given up, when God forbid they were in your shoes they would be at a loss themselves. So it hit me that i think fighting is relative to the person and situation. Did you get up? Get dressed? Say, “good morning” to your family? Hug your kids and family members? Try to eat breakfast even though it doesn’t taste like anything anymore? Be AMAZINGLY kind and thoughtful to everyone that crosses your path? Ask someone else how THEY are doing? Smile at your nieces and nephews being silly? I think anyone who knows Rachel, knows without a doubt all these things happen, and then some. I leave visiting my childhood friend who I love so much, feeling encouraged by her faith, but hating to see her in pain. I pray for healing! I do not want her to leave us, I want to be selfish and make her stay somehow….but I also think she should know that it’s ok….that when God calls her home where there is no more pain, that it’s more than ok to run for it as fast as she can. And though she tells me she doesn’t feel like a fighter, she really is…and I love her dearly for it. This isn’t what she chose this happened to her, but she IS choosing every day, maybe hundreds of times a day, how to deal with it. And to keep believing and trusting God, to smile at someone, to drink some hot tea, or to eat a piece of pizza with her husband and sister IS fighting.
Thank you Sue!
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